Genius Hurts...

Nolan: Pats 28-27

P.G.: Pats 21-17

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N.I.:N.O., Den, Bal, NY
P.G.:SF, NE, Bal, NY

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Nolan: Hou, Det, NY, Pitt

P.G.: Cin, NO, NY, Pitt

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Nolan: Phi, Atl, SF, Minn, GB, NYG, NO, Tenn, Cinci, Cle, ind, Mia, NE, SD, KC, Sea

P.G.: Wash, Atl, SF, Minn, GB, NYG, Car, Hou, BAL, Cle, Ind, NYJ, Buff, SD, KC, Sea

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Nolan: Hou, Oak, Buff, Tenn. Cinci, NE, Cle, Wash, Car, Pitt, SD, SF, Phi, GB, Atl, NYG 31-30

P.G.: Hou, KC, Den, Jax , Zona, NE, Cle, Wash, Car, Pitt, SD, Sea, Phi, GB, NO, NYJ 21-16

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Nolan: Jax, Dal, Wash, GB, NO, Sea, Mia, Car, Tenn, Cinc, Det, NE, NYJ, Ari, Bal, Pitt

P.G.: TB, Wash, GB, Minn, Sea, Mia, Car, Ind, Cinci, Det, NE, Phi, Ari, Bal, Pitt

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Nolan: Atl, Mia, Cinci, Cle, Oak, Car, TB, Dal, SF, Stl, SD, Phi, N

P.G.: Atl, Mia, Cinci, Jax, Oak, Car, GB, Wash, SF, Sea, SD, Phi, KC

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Considering theres no NBA season, well be tracking the Rumson Country Day League

GHGA take game 1 in impressive fashion 58-48 against Bauer’s Boys

The P.G’s Stat Line

MP              5            ]

PTS             5

REBOUNDS    0            

STEALS            0

ASSISTS           0

BLOCKS            0    

3FGM/3FGA     1/2        ]

FTM/FTA          0/0

FGM/FGA         2/3

The Prognosticating Genius arrived fashionably late due to an equipment malfunction (No Shirt or Sneakers) but was able to get there right after the inbounds to start the 2nd half. The team was down 3 and looked sluggish, as soon as the Prognosticating Genius stepped on the floor, the Sunday Funday League team champs, resurfaced and the Genius Army marched forward to victory, sparked by a crushing 3 from the wing by The P. Genius and what cant be understated is the P.G.’s (not to be mistaken with Point Guard) intangibles that are not seen on the stat sheet. He got physical with the opponent, he got his defense in the right place, he got the rotation cleaned up, and he seized the opportunity to drain jumpers with the D draped all over him. And then he took a seat back on the bench… and watched his design take shape. 1 and 0, men, 1 and friggin 0.

Game MVP: James Jones

As you all may already know… Genius Hurts Guys have invested their hard earned cash into sponsoring an adult mens hoops team in the Rumson Country Day League, which has major players in the investement world blown away…

Says Warren Baffett, entrepreneur :
“The GH guys cease to amaze me with their ever growing portfolio, their latest investment has got me rethinking my whole approach to banking and investing, I will seriously be considering allocating my funds, which pale in comparison to the bottomless pit the Nolan and the devilishly handsome Prognosticating Genius seem to draw from, into local over 30 adult mens league’s teams. The P.G. has already helped me skyrocket my bankroll in black market investments, i.e. his low risk, high reward locks he provides every week on his website, free of charge”

Says Jim Crammer, Personality:
“If you don’t tune in weekly to the GH guys, I don’t know if there is any intellectually or financially aware characteristics in your DNA, please don’t reproduce, it is people like you who have caused the Market to crash”

Anyway….a brief introduction to the Geniushurts.com, Genius Army Roster

THE STARTING FIVE:
WILL GUERIN, GUARD: A veteran of the adult men’s league circuit, fresh off a solid season in the Red Bank Sunday Funday league, which was capped by a league championship. An instigator of offense, dangerous on the open floor, unlimited range, and go to scorer in crunch time. His 8 month hiatus from touching a basketball could hurt him early on as he gets into playing shape… Says Will “I promise my impending Nuptials will not be a distraction, I expect perfection in all aspects of life, especially adult mens league basketball. Perfection from myself and my teammates” I just got the chills.

NBA Equivalent: Anfernee Hardaway, circa 1994

JAMES JONES, GUARD: A polished scorer, with a silky smooth J, a relentless defender who always seems to get into passing lanes and start a break. James joined the squad after his walk year in the Sunday Funday League, reasoning that: “I am just looking to win,” well JJ you’re in the right place.

NBA Equivalent: Michael Jordan, circa 1993

TIM BRUCKMAN, GUARD: Tim catapaults himself into the starting rotation, after coming off the bench and providing a spark for last years champs in the Sunday Funday League. Dangerous perimeter scorer with elite knowledge of the game. Says Tim, “I am relishing the opportunity to see big minutes, my sponsors will not be disappointed”

NBA Equivalent: Mark Price, circa 1989

RYAN JOHNSON, FORWARD: Unstoppable scorer inside and out. Elite rebounder and has mastered the art of shit talking. Big Locker room presence. Says Ryan, “Nobody in any league can stop me” Damn straight, RJ.

NBA Equivalent: Dirk Nowitzki, circa 2011

JASON BROOKS, FORWARD: Battled eligibility issues in the Sunday Funday league after complaints from other teams that “He didn’t sign up in time” C’mon guys. Brooks provides the missing piece for the GHGA dynasty, big time inside presence with shot blocking and rebounding skills that are second to none and instills fear into the opponents willingness to want to scrap with the our squad in the paint. Excellent finisher. Says Jason, “Last year was Bullshit, they were just scared, I feel for our oppnents in the RCD League, they will be recieving the brunt of my frustration.” Yikes.

NBA Equivalent: Lamarcus Aldridge, circa 2011

THE 6th MEN

KRIS PARKER, FORWARD: Fierce competitor, rebounder, and defender. Says Kris, “I’m still a little hurt that no one picked me up for the Sunday Funday League, I’m over it now, I been working on my game and will contribute every second I’m on the floor” Solid attitude KP.

NBA Equivalent: Malik Rose, circa 1999

RYAN BOOCH, FORWARD/CENTER: Key returner to the Sunday Funday League squad who has been demoted to the bench. Will miss some time because he is currently battling an injury, attitude and effort remain a question mark. Says Booch “Get away from me, I play for me. We only won last year because of me” Hmm…A lot of “me’s” in that statement

NBA Equivalent: Greg Ostertag, circa right now

ADAM MERKLINGER, GUARD: Big time chemistry player, ball handler. The proverbial coach on the floor, who can bang an occassional dagger when needed. Says Merk, “My main focus is to make the most of my minutes and the guys around me, thats my job” He actually said this.

NBA Equivalent: Derek Fisher, circa 2003

JACK DUGAN AKA PROGNOSTICATING GENIUS, FORWARD: Jack of all trades, master of none. Has battled injury, weight, personal, substance abuse, endurance and attitude issues throughout his career. Classic overachiever, great communicator, lethal outside shooter, a match up nightmare for opponents, great passer and the glue that holds his team together when things seem to go awry. Excellent form when signaling for a timeout. Says Dugan ” I know a lot has been said about me recently, but my track record speaks for itself, plus I fronted the money for this team, so kiss my ass” Words from a true gentleman.

NBA Equivalent: Its as if Keith Van Horn, circa 1998 had a child with Tractor Traylor, circa 2000 and then Larry Bird, circa 1986 and Austin Croshere, circa 2001 had a child, and those 2 children had a child, gross and impossible.

Honorable Mentions:
MIKE TEDESCHI, GUARD and MIKE YACCARINO, GUARD: Remains to be seen if they grace us with their appearance.

* None of the above quotes or analysis entirely accurate, remember this is just some asshole on a computer who has nothing better to do. *

 Monday Night Football Line

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NFL Lines For Week 10 – NFL Football Line Week Ten
NFL Line 11/10 – 11/14, 2011

P.G.: Oak

Nolan: SD

*locks underlined and bolded

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The bottom quarter of the QB’s in this league…. 25 through 32

#25 Andy Dalton; Cincinatti Bengals

#26 Christian Ponder, Minnesota Vikings

#27 Tim Tebow, Denver Broncos

#28 John Beck, Washington Redskins

#29 Matt Moore, Miami Dolphins

#30 Charlie Whitehurst, Seattle Seahwaks

#31 Blaine Gabbert, Jacksonville Jaguars

#32 Curtis Painter, Indianoplis Colts

Andy Dalton is a guy who has some real potential, and I feel bad grading him so low right now, he’s a straight Bad Ass on the field, great competitor, has got good size and skill, good intangibles, but for now I would have a hard time playing him above the others because hes still raw and unpolished and has a propensity to make mistakes in the red zone, this guy will definitely be a top tier quarterback some day….. Christian Ponder showed me things I wasn’t expecting last week against Green Bay, I will eat my words, but again for now I’m still going with what I saw at FSU…. Ask yourself how would you feel with Tim Tebow running your offense (unless your a God Fearing Evangilist Christian) but I have to tell you God (if you believe in that sort of thing) has better things to do than help Tim Tebow make the Prognosticating Genius’s Top Ten…. Beck and Moore are bums and are playing out of pitiful circumstance and for Beck, BYU people are weirdo’s ask the dumbrock yourself; Hate Blaine Gabbert, spread offense guy a la David Klingler (way to pin your final season on this guy, Del Rio) and Painter should start writing Indie folk music because he’s not collecting an NFL pay check for much longer.

….. and that’ll do it.

QB’s 17 through 24…

#17 Matt Stafford. Detroit Lions

#18 Ryan Fitzpatrick, Buffalo Bills

#19 Joe Flacco, Baltimore Ravens

#20 Mark Sanchez, New York Jets

#21 Carson Palmer, Oakland Raiders

#22 Colt McCoy, Cleveland Browns

#23 Kevin Kolb, Arizona Cardnials

#24 Alex Smith, San Francisco 49ers

Matt Stafford will inject himself into the top 15 very soon, I still like Bradford and others before him and need to see him without Megatron, Guys got a lot of guts, good throwing arm, but is always a play away from being out of commission…… Some Could argue Ryan Fitzpatrick is for real, slow down, idiots, I’ve seen this guy play before and he can be just as boneheaded as the back half of the QB’s in this league, maybe he will change my mind, he sure changed Buffallo’s with that $10 million dollar signing bonus…. Joe Flacco, I know John Clayton and other football know it all’s (including Nolan) love this guy, how could you not he has great size, mobility and a rifle arm but has Eli’s unaffectness to a detriment and gets lost in big games plus no first downs against the Jags (cha ching). Give me one good performance on the big stage (aka playoffs or Monday Night) and not some stat building whipping post game against the hapless Doo doo Browns, plus he left the University of Pittsburgh because Tyler Palko beat him out and he felt sorry for himself and went to Delaware…. Mark Sanchez may not be Dan Marino but has gotten my team to the AFC championship game twice and pulls games out of his Meso American Ass when it looks like all hope is lost; has got good tools (good feet and throwing arm) and has shown the ability to shake off some pretty poor starts but I don’t ever think this guy will ascend to anywhere above a top 15 QB in the League….. Carson Palmer may be getting a knock here because of him not playing football the last couple of months, but even before that I never thought  he would ever regain the form he once had and the game seems to be passing him by (think Drew Bledsoe) whether it be by injury, money, or desire…. Colt McCoy has stones just not the size or arm strength to ever be a player to crack the top 10, but is and can be serviceable as starter in this league…. Kevin Kolb might be better than this in the right system, he is certainly better than Leinart and Derek Anderson, but let’s wait before we crown him a prolific passer in this league, hes got talent around him and a good coaching staff there to be successful, but just isn’t getting the job done, I thought he would have been better….. Alex Smith has talent but also has confidence issues, think David Carr, nuff said.

Rankings 8 through 16….

# 9 Tony Romo, Dallas Cowboys

#10 Cam Newton, Carolina Panthers

#11 Josh Freeman, Tampa Bay Buccaneers

#12 Matt Hasselbeck, Tennessee Titans

#13 Matt Cassel, Kansas City Chiefs

#14 Matt Ryan, Atlanta Falcons

#15 Jay Cutler, Chicago Bears

#16 Sam Bradford, St. Louis Rams

Tight race on QB’s 8 through 16. Romo gets you to the playoffs, has the capability to throw 30 TD’s and somewhere between 3,500 and 4000 yards, however he IS to blame for losses and his coaches don’t trust him in the 4th quarter……. Glam Cam will eventually be a top 5 player in this league no doubt and it could be argued that he is just as good now as the guys in front of him, gets a knock for lack of wins (on a bad Panthers team) and inexperience, he will be a force to reckon with each week and beyond….. Josh Freeman wins ballgames and carries the entire load on offense, much more heady than people give him credit for, wills that neophyte Bucs team to victories…… Hasselbeck is a saavy vet with the door just about to close on him but he is a really smart guy, who is fearless and can make all throws, Titans are in playoff contention because of his play this year and has a solid resume which includes taking SEATTLE to the superbowl….. Matt Cassel is another heady and strong willed QB who piles regualar season victories on a team with little talent on O and a crazy ass coach, I can understand why people disagree here, but start a blog dickbags and then we’ll talk….. Matt Ryan is another guys whos having a down year but he has 3 years of more wins than losses, but I’m still not entirely sold on him being a top flight QB and he plays in a god damn dome…. Cutler is a guy I truly hate who has been inconsistent every year and has cost me lots of units, Mike Martz is hurting him, physically, Im convinced….. Sam Bradford needs a new Offensive coordinator and not a guy who thinks he invented football and is a douche, insane Dan Marino type potential being wasted if things don’t change.

Here we go…The Top 8 Quarterbacks you’d want on your squad to play for you this week, all things being equal, of course.

#1 Aaron Rodgers, Green Bay Packers

#2 Tom Brady, New England Patriots

#3 Drew Brees, New Orleans Saints

#4 Eli Manning, New York Giants

#5 Michael Vick, Philadelphia Eagles

#6 Phillip Rivers, San Diego Chargers

#7 Ben Roethlisberger, Pittsburgh Steelers

#8 Matt Schuab, Houston Texans

The above players are all big time winners (exception being Schaub). Rodgers, Brady, and Brees are no brainers….. Eli to me has been impressive all year and is the main reason that offense goes, on top of the fact that hes got a superbowl ring and you can pencil him for 25 TD’s every year….. You can never convince me that Vick is not a difference maker and that you wouldnt want that guy running your team’s offense if your guy is anyone ranked on the list #6 and below…… Rivers has had a down year, but I will be shocked if the guy doesn’t toss 20 something TD’s and throws for 4000 yards, needs to start playing better in the playoffs…… Roethlisberger makes things happen, albeit in an ugly fashion and doesnt put up gaudy numbers like some of his other counterparts, but his regular season and playoff victories are hard to argue against….. Schaub and Romo to me are a c hair away from being the same player, I’m giving the nod to Schaub because he doesn’t possess the same meltdown under pressure quality that Romo has…

Before I give you the “Skinny” on each of the starting 32 QB’s in the League and where they rank against one another this season….

As a quarterback in the NFL there are certain characteristics that these guys must possess to reach certain levels of success. Here are the characteristics (in order of importance)…

#1. Intelligence, ergo smarts: Knowing the Rules (Ahem, Donovan McNabb) and your own playbook and the ability to comprehend what is in front of you, whether it be pre snap reads, during the play progressions, abilty to process information/coaching, adjusting mechanics and work in the classroom, all of the intelligence it takes to digest what makes an offense become successful and avoid being stagnant. In a perfect world and to some degree a Quarterback should be an extension of his Offensive Coordinator and his head coach executing plays and reads to a T of how the gameplan is drawn up and the ability to improvise as defenses counteract that gameplan. This attribute trumps our next attribute, only because if you make an NFL roster it is because that there is some ability there to actually toss the skin for you to play, however, it is the Intelligence factor that sets you apart and we all know it is the slightest of margins in all things that can mean the difference between Failure and Success (a line to me, which is never blurred)

BEST EXAMPLES: Drew Brees, Peyton Manning and Chad Pennington

WORST EXAMPLES: Donovan Mcnabb, Terry Bradshaw, Trent Dilfer, Scott Mitchell, Vince Young, Ryan Leaf and Jamarcus Russel

#2 Passing Ability, ergo Leg Balance, Arm Strength and Accuracy: Although this is no surprise to the above average football observer, the ability to actually make the throw (Arm Strength) and put the reciever in a position to make plays (Accuracy) play a huge role in being an upper echelon quarterback, going back to the theory of marginal differences and supporting my previous ranking of the attribute of Football Intelligence .

BEST EXAMPLES: Peyton Manning, Joe Montana (Accuracy), Jay Cutler and Dan Marino

WORST EXAMPLES: Chad Pennington (Strength) and Tim Tebow (Accuracy)

#3 Attitude, ergo Leadership, Poise, Resilience, and straight Bad ass-ness: Although a vague attribute, being able to keep your cool when 200 to 300 pound borderline criminals are looking for blood and the ability to bounce back from blows that devastate any mental midgets at the position. Being the guy who lets an interception or a dropped ball check him out of games, and is able to pull it together to get the W in some of the most dire of circumstances and of course infecting your teammates with that same bravado. It may seem that the word ADVERSITY is overused, but it is something prevalent throughout the 60 minutes of football played on the field that you must overcome, unless your name is Michael Vick, which encapsulates his entire life.

BEST EXAMPLES: Drew Brees, John Elway, Phil Simms, Joe Montana, Steve Mcnair and Tom Brady (The List is miles Long)

WORST EXAMPLES: Vince Young, Jeff George, Jay Cutler, Jamarcus Russell, and Ryan Leaf

#4 Athletic Ability, ergo Speed and Agility (for all you Madden Fags including me): Being able to resort to speed and making plays with your legs is an important attibute as well, which in some cases can mask your lack of strength in some of the other attributes, because at the end of the day it is about moving the chains and scoring touchdowns, whether it be by ground or the air.

BEST EXAMPLES: Michael Vick, Tim Tebow, Ken Stabler, Roger Staubach, and Steve Young

WORST EXAMPLES: Dan Marino, Tom Brady, Joe Namath, Kurt Warner, and Johnny Unitas

Picks and stuff coming Friday…

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Week 7 picks from the GH Guys
Faves            DAWGS                             Nolan                  J.D.
CHI -1         TB (In London)                   TB                      CHI
@CAR-2.5     Wash                                Wash                  CAR
SD -1.5          @NYJ                                  NYJ                     SD
@CLE -3           SEA                                   CLE                    CLE
@TENN -3       Hou                                  Hou                    Hou
@MIA -1           Den                                  MIA                    Den
@DET -3.5       ATL                                  ATL                    DET
@Oak -4           K.C.                                  Oak                    K .C.
Pitt -4             @Ariz                                  Pitt                      Ariz
@DAL-13         StL                                     StL                      StL
G.B.-9.5          Minn                                  G.B.                    G.B.
@N.O.-13.5   Indy                                    N.O.                   N.O.
Balt -8          @JAX                                   Balt                     Balt

Nolans Locks: Baltimore; Pittsburgh
Prognosticating Genius Locks: Baltimore; St. Louis; Denver; Houston; Green Bay

Current Standings Under Review….to be settled on next weeks show.

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Recaps and looks forward….picks coming Friday

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Week 5 NFL Picks by the GH Guys

NOLAN                         P.G.
At Green Bay -14.5 St. Louis                      G.B.                               StL

At Pittsburgh  -12.5 Jacksonville             Pitt                                 Pitt

Philadelphia  -1.5 At Washington         WASH                          WASH

At Detroit  -4 San Francisco                  SanFran                            S.F.

At Atlanta  -4 Carolina                          Carolina                              AtL

At Cincinnati  -7 Indianapolis              INDY                               INDY

At NY Giants  -3 Buffalo                         NYG                                   NYG

At Baltimore  -8 Houston                      HOU                                  HOU

At Oakland  -6.5 Cleveland                    CLE                                    CLE

At New England  -7 Dallas                   Dallas                               Dallas

New Orleans  –4.5 At Tampa Bay        N.O.                                   N.O

At Chicago  -2 Minnesota                       Minn                                  CHI

Monday Night Football Odds

At NYJ -7 Miami                                         NYJ                                   NYJ

P.G.’s Locks: Washington; New Orleans; Cleveland; New York Jets

Nolans Locks: NYG; New Orleans; NYJ; Houston

Current Standings:

Nolan: 11 points to date
P.G.: 19 points to date

Last week:

Nolan: 3 points
P.G.: 7 points

Also check out our friends at www.stillflyinghigh.com and www.ibudyou.com

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Jet Offensive Grades for Week 5 – Jets vs. Pats 10/9/2011

QUARTERBACK: Mark Sanchez – Grade: C
Rex and the Jets said they were going to return to the “Ground and Pound” and they did. Mark was given easy reads and options so he couldn’t turn over the ball thereby eliminating him from being a factor in the 1st 3 quarters of the game, and the Defense’s inability to prevent the Law Group – Ben, Jarvus, Green & Ellis from picking up 1st downs in the 4th Quarter. Although we couldn’t convert 3rd downs pretty much all day, I refuse to place blame for the loss on Marks play because of conservative playcalling. Wrong week to not try to throw it around the park.
Best Play of the day: Rollout TD pass to Kerley
Worst Play: Pass to Mason on 3rd and 8 for 6 yards (“Hackett plays” burn the P.G. up)

RUNNING BACKS: Shonn Green; Ladainian Tomlinson; Joe McKnight – GRADE: B
Shonn Green finally got 20 touches from behind the LOS and took advantage. Ran with power and reckless abandon which is something I haven’t seen from him all year. LT didn’t touch the ball a whole bunch and didn’t do much when he did. Joe McKnight, only putting his name in here because of the explosive KR he has become, but I think its time to start mixing him in as a change of pace back a la Darren Sproles (one can only hope)
Best Play: Shonn Green TD run
Worst Play: LT draw on 3rd and 6

WIDE RECIEVERS: Burress; Holmes; Kerley; Mason – Grade: C
Burress dropped some passes last week, but almost made up for it with a fantastic effort to haul in a high pass on 3rd and 16 in the 3rd that was for 1st down and was initially ruled as such, after the evil Genius had it overturned by rigging the replay cameras, he had very little impact. Holmes, had some big catches on the Jets 1st Half TD march, but has had any breakout plays all year (even if its only been a few times hes been given that chance), this trend continued. Kerley had his 1st NFL TD got himself open on another occasion near the Goal Line which Sanchise failed to see. Mason was benched for God knows what and had 1 catch on 3rd down that he couldnt get past the sticks.
BEST PLAY: Kerley TD Reception
WORST PLAY: Mason Reception failing to deliver a 1st down

TIGHT END: Keller – GRADE: C-
Not his fault was only targeted twice all day; Did seal some edges to open up the running game, and said he was OK with the lack of opportunities because he was being double teamed (suspect)
Best Play: Green Run for 9 yards around the edge culminated with a punishing Keller Block
WORST PLAY: Not being thrown to all game

OFFENSIVE LINE: Ferguson; Moore; Mangold; Slauson; Hunter – GRADE: C
Not a pathetic performance, which has been the case all season long sans Jacksonville. I am starting to think (ergo Hope) this O-Line can and will Gel. Lets hope the lack of OTA’s in the offseason is to blame for their early struggles.
BEST PLAY: Green TD run
Worst PLay: Sanchez sack at the end of the game

Week 5 NFL Picks….. Get it done

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The P.G.’s Gambler’s Guide – Records Against the Spread

Well, Degenerates, 1st quarter of the 2011 NFL Season is complete… here is a team by team record against the GH spreads (provided by footballlocks.com)

Green Bay (3-1 against the spread)
G.B. has been a solid pick to cover spreads, look to play units on the cheese heads against middle of the road defense and .500 and below teams, regardless of big spreads. Solid Play.

Saints (3-1 against the spread)
New Orleans has been money at home this year, shy away from playing them in outdoor games away from the superdome and keep your eye on spreads as the weather gets cooler. Play with knowledge.

Pats (3-1 against the spread)
Brady does his thing every year (I just threw up); N.E. hits at roughly 65% (ref: my genius brain) since 2002, covering spreads. Solid Play.

Lions (3-1 against the spread)
No remnants of the Matt Millen Era Here anymore, these cats are killing it, be careful in games away from home (See Saints, New Orleans) and veteran teams. They’re off to a fast start, which could see the 2nd and 3rd quarter games with some large spreads against lesser teams, play against starting week 5/6.

Ravens (3-1 against the spread)
The Ray Lewis hit squad had a hiccup against Tennessee, Pick them at home with less than 5 points spreads and on the road if they get any points, Flacco is always susceptible to give crappy teams a back door cover. Play with Caution.

Bills (2-1-1 against the spread)
Chan Gailey still coaches this team right? Think about playing against until the Lines start to normalize, when the Bills come back to earth.

Jets (1-3 against the spread)
Things are starting sour for the gangrenous crew. Stay away or pick against (I wish I took my own advice)

Texans (3-1 against the spread)
Texans are coming into their own and are for real, don’t forget Arian Foster is back. Solid Play, especially at home.

Chargers (1-3 against the spread)
Not sure what to make of this team, Phillip Rivers is still great and can put up points, and Norv Turner has developed a history of going on runs in the 2nd Half of the season. Feel it out, it’s a Gamble (pun totally intended)

Steelers (1-3 against the spread)
Definitely not the Steel curtain of yesteryear, Big Ben might be out next week. Steelers tend to get points because they are, in fact, the Steelers. Play Against for the time being.

Cowboys (2-2 against the spread)
See Chargers, San Diego. Rolling the Romo Dice. Your Call.

Giants (3-1 against the spread)
Eli’s hitting his stride, pass rushers galore, effective running backs, underrated Offensive Line, starting to remind me, dare I say it, of the 2007 Giants (anyone else feel the P.G. jinx? You were meant to). Solid Play.

Raiders (2-1-1 against the spread)
Umm Jason Campbell still plays for them right? Veteran Defense with no secondary help, count on McFadden missing games. Will do just enough to not cover spreads. Play Against when favored.

Buccaneers (3-1 against the spread)
Josh Freeman wins ballgames, just doesn’t cover spreads when favored by more than 2.5 points. Play Accordingly.

Titans (3-1 against the spread)
Matt Hasselbeck will wear down, Chris Johnson bounced back, no Britt, looking at an 8-8 team. I’d hold your units, wait and see is the play here.

Redskins (3-1 against the spread)
I actually like the Redskins, who’s defense is not being talked about enough, will always keep games close as long as the real Rex Grossman doesn’t show up, Play when Dogs by more than 2.5 points.

Eagles (1-3 against the spread)
I hear Vince Young is back. Real Problems on Defense and the Offensive Line, Play against when favored.

Bears (1-3 against the spread)
Mike Martz + Jay Cutler + Lovie Smith’s Tampa 2 + No running game = Play Against

Falcons (1-3 against the spread)
Love Mike Smith, Like Matt Ryan, Hate playing any games the Falcons are involved in. At Risk Play all year.

49ers (3-1 against the spread)
Think 2010 Kansas City Chiefs, getting enough out of Alex Smith to keep them competitive. Solid Play for now, keep an eye out if they become favorites late in the season.

Browns (1-3 against the spread)
Cleveland hasn’t been a solid play since Bernie Kosar and Marty Schottenheimer. Steer Clear.

Carolina (2-1-1 against the spread)
Cam Glam Newton and Co. has made things interesting, I would play as long as they’re Dogs.

Cardinals (1-2-1 against the spread)
What kind of player is Kevin Kolb? What kind of coach is Ken Whisenhunt? What kind of Running Back is Beanie Wells? Outside of Larry Fitzgerald, I have no clue what to think of this team, Pick Against as favorites.

Seahawks (3-1 against the spread)
Hmmmmmmmmmm……..DO NOT PLAY GAMES FOR OR AGAINST.

Jaguars (0-4 against the spread)
The final days of Jack Del Rio’s coaching career are approaching, he’s only held the job for 8 years and has 1 playoff win. Big problems in Jacksonville, and Blaine Gabbert’s not the answer. Play Against, everytime

Broncos (1-3 against the spread)
Hate this team as long as the Orton show continues. Tebow fills in and he’ll become the ultimate spread ruin-er. Play against as long as Orton has the ball.

Bengals (3-1 against the spread)
Solid D; Solid Running Game, A promising quarterback who knows how to win and bounce back from mistakes. Can’t believe I’m saying this, Play the Bengals as Underdogs, be wary of when they are favored

Vikings (2-2 against the spread)
Christian Ponder time, its over McNabb, I believed that AP and the D could bail you out of your Non-factoritis, unfortunately you cant even move the chains anymore. Why is he still playing? Play against until QB change then wait, and play against again, because Christian Ponder will also be a bum.

Dolphins (1-3 against the spread)
Sparano’s done, Henne’s just about at bum status, Reggie Bush is not a running back and the Defense was overrated. Play against, unless they’re playing the Jets or Dan Marino comes out of retirement. Oh and screw you Jason Taylor, go away.

Colts (2-2 against the spread)
Surprisingly enough the Colts are at .500 against the spread this year, I don’t expect Peyton Manning back this year, and I’ve seen Curtis Painter, Play Colts as Big Underdogs or stay away.

Rams (0-4 against the spread)
Not enough playmakers on offense to right the ship this year, Bradford is a star and Spags is a good coach, its just one of those everything goes wrong years, been there done that. Play Against.

Chiefs (2-2 against the spread)
Running Backs punching receivers, Coach is fighting with the players, Coach is fighting with the GM, Matt Cassel Looks eerily similar to Zack Morris, unfortunately Valley High isn’t on the schedule this year. Play against, with caution.

Week 4 NFL Picks
______________________NOLAN                    P.Genius
Detroit @ Dallas -2                  Dallas                          Detroit
N.Orleans @ Jax +7                 N.O.                            N.O.
San Fran @ Philly -9                S.F.                             S.F.
Washington @ Stl +2               StL                             Wash
Tenn @ Cleveland -1                Tenn                            Cle
Buffalo @ Cinci +3                    Buff                            Cinci
Minnesota @ K.C. +2.5          Minn                          Minn
Carolina @ Chicago -6             Car                              Car
Pittsburgh @ Houston -3.5      Hou                           Hou
ATL @ Seattle +4.5                    ATL                            Sea
NY Giants @ Arizona +1          NYG                          NYG
San Diego @ Miami +7            MIA                          MIA
Denver @ Green Bay -12          G.B.                          Den
New England @ Oakland +5 Oak                           N.E.
NY Jets @ Baltimore -3.5       NYJ                           NYJ

Monday
Indy @ T.B. -10                         T.B.                            Indy

Nolans Locks: New Orleans; Oakland
P.G.’s Locks: San Fran; Minnesota; NY Giants; New England

New Rules: Every Win counts as a point, Every Loss 0 points; Lock Wins +2 points; Lock Losses -1 point

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Real men can admit when they’re wrong and the P.G. would be the first to admit that his plays and picks have been substandard… While I’ve sported a .500 record in the early goings of the NFL season (not an accomplishment that should be scoffed at) he expects better of himself. Plus in real life, -750 units has the P.G. feeling gun shy, but in true Clint Eastwood Fashion, he plans on riding off into the sunset, an anti-hero, a subject of ridicule, but a man on a mission, against all nay-sayers and amateur prognosticators, to his true destiny…

Anyway, the Jets stunk up the joint out there in Oak-town and putting my misplaced angst (and dollars) aside I expect a true Rex Ryan back to basics week of practice, Has anyone heard from big Rex this week? Not much. You would think something would come out of Florham regarding the Jets showdown with Rex’s former team, and what have we heard? Broadway Joe chirping about Rex building his team up too much and it taking away from the Jets preparation? This coming from the guy who created his own spotlight/distraction with the “guarantee” and not to mention a man who got stone drunk and asked Suzy Kolber to swap DNA with him. So Joe, I pay homage to your Super Bowl MVP award being that you’re the only quarterback in the history of the NFL to win the award without contributing a TD pass. Regardless, please, no comments from the irrelevant gallery.

Look to our latest podcasts and blog’s for insight and picks for week 4 in this NFL season, but jump off the P.G.’s bandwagon now and you wont be forgiven…

With infinite blogs, newspapers and radio and t.v. time needing to be filled with something, the result is a whole lot of bullshit becoming “conventional wisdom”. This is nothing new or insightful, and I would think (pray) there is some level of awareness about the difference between coors light cold hard facts(etc.)–and facts. Facts reside in the realm of reality (reality meaning real in this case) whereas your Espn-SI-mega media dribble is 98% mindless filler only coming into existence to reach a word count or kill time before the next Dodge/Chevy/Levis/A1/Viagra commercial for tough guys who like tough sports and hot chicks and awesome slang, cold beer and fuckin wings baby.

There is nothing wrong with this and I really dont find too much fault with the corporate raping of our cherished pastimes. Its like elections- politicians and all their bullshit are PURELY a result of their constituents–liquids take the form of their container–and sportscenter is mindless trash b/c people like to fill their minds with it. So good on you corporations of america for dumbing it down to keep the profits up.

The only issue I have is the lack of awareness that this is the case.

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Perception: The Giants should have done more in free agency like the Eagles did b/c now the Eagles have a superior team personnel wise.

Reality: Although the Giants took a few hits in free agency, they did an excellent job in the draft and maintained (if not strengthened) the core of the team. Our offensive line is better (Dielh better that Seubert, Baas better than O-Hara, Beatty more talented tackle than Dielh), we kept TWO high quality backs, and have a top 5 D-line AND secondary. Nicks and Manningham are up and coming high grade players, Michael Boley is as athletic as they come at outside linebacker (finally healthy), and Kiwanuka is a playmaker and premier pass rusher at SAM. Point being, even with the ridiculous injuries you are looking at a VERY talented team with ZERO glaring deficiencies (by the way Steve Smith is VERY replaceable…pure possession receiver with no run after the catch or deep threat ability. i.e. always catches the ball and falls down to protect himself and is literally incapable of the plays Victor Cruz made this past weekend).

On the other hand the Eagles signed 2 slightly above average defensive linemen (Babin would be our 4th end and Jenkins is good but Lindvel Joseph has more upside and run stuffing power to him), Nnamdi is overrated (you know he aint worth that money) and a nickel corner with a penchant for getting burned and a healthy reluctance to tackle people. Wait wait…the icing on the cake to make this team a dream….VINCE YOUNG!. Oooh boy hes brings a whole other dimension of clipboard carrying underachievers the Eagles were really missing.

So all the hubub about their signings was blown way out of proportion. Now I know they are a very talented team and will be a force this season, but this is the NFL and if you are looking at their 53 versus a lot of other 53′s, man for man…they are no big deal.

Case in point….whereas the Giants have no glaring deficiencies, the Eagles are totally and completely fucked at linebacker and offensive line. I mean disasterous at those units. Not to mention their new defensive coordinator was the god damn O-line coach for years. Now that far outweighs whatever gains they made in free agency.

——-

Now I know this unproof-read rambling comes AFTER the Giants beat the Eagles this weekend, but those who know me or have listened to the show know this is nothing new. Reality doesn’t change no matter how many idiots flap their gums (me included).

By the way, GMen get Osi, Manningham and a 19th overall pick named Prince back in the coming weeks….all front line players.

And, after going 9-7 this weekend I am all tied up with the P.G.

Man, slaughter-fest early on this season for the P.G.; well I decided to run my action with the J-E-T-S with a straight up bet on the 3.5 points the Jets are giving to the raiders. The Jets Defense, by their own account, should handle the Raiders O-ffense and do enough with their own offense to pull away from the Al Davis, err I mean, Hue Jackson led squad. An uneasy pick to say the least because I still don’t know what the Jet Offense is. Is Mark Sanchez ready to stop being enigmatic, and become consistent? Can the Jets reinvent themselves on the ground with Shonn Greene? Can the Offensive Line put together a collective effort this week, without their best player, Mangold? Im hoping these questions are answered this week. Jets 24 – Raiders 10

AROUND THE LEAGUE

On the back end of my my bets, Im spinning another C-note on a three team parlay of San Francisco, Detroit, and Houston. 2 teams are on the rise (Detroit and Houston) and I seriously believe these teams are contenders. Detroit goes into Minnesota FAVORED by 3 1/2 points, (someone tell me the last time thats happened) and my thoughts are that Minnesota is lost on Offense with the exception of their “man among boys” running back Adrian Peterson, who I think will be countered with with Detroit’s front 7, especially Suh and Fairley. Detroit must and will stack the box and let McNabb try and beat them, Detroit 31- Minnesota 17…. Houston goes on the road to the superdome and are 4 point dogs. Yes, New Orleans, had a super effort from the D last week and Brees was and will be Brees. But for Houston this game is a “where the fuck do we stand?” game, which, in the past they haven’t been able to get out of bed for. But this year is different, a team who has been the perennial “sleeper” team, will finally stop sleeping, and will turn heads this week, with a resounding Win on the road against a top NFC team, Houston 28 New Orleans 16….San Francisco, my proverbial “swing game” pick, are dogs by 3 points on the road in Cincinatti, in a battle of “who’s team is less of a mess” And if you break this game down to experience and coaching, I will take Jim Harbaugh and Alex Smith over the rook Andy Dalton, whose had impressive poise thus far, and the ultimate loser in Marvin Lewis. San Francisco pulls a tight game out, 19-17. Good Luck, SFB’s.